The best dakimakura let you spread your waifu’s legs

on September 13, 2017 by

The best dakimakura let you spread your waifu’s legs

The best dakimakura are here. Finally, my friends, a new day in waifu tech is dawning. As the End Times draw near, we will be able to spread the legs of our peach-skinned best-girls, maximising both comfort and eroticism.


To be honest, I have no idea if these things have been around for years or not. Fact is, this is the first I’ve come across, what is undoubtedly, the best dakimakura tech I have ever encountered. And because it’s the first time I’m seeing it, I am assuming it’s completely fresh news.


If it’s not, well… WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME BEFORE?!


Lets look at some pictures, shall we?



Yup, that’s a Y-Shaped pillow case alright! I particularly like the little diagram (top middle) showing how you may like to use said pillow. It’s always nice to have a little guidance when it comes to your first intimate encounter with the waifu of your dreams.


Personally, I prefer not to straddle immediately, instead opting for polite and slightly uncomfortable conversation, ideally accompanied with as many bottles of wine as is humanly possible – so that I can’t feel the tears of anguish rolling down my face at 10.30pm when I’m waiting for the bus home.



The diagram in figure 2 represents the unlikely event that I am invited ‘back’ to the mythical ‘my place’. Four bottles of red wine do not, an attentive lover, make.


I am the dissappointer of dakimakura everywhere, preferring to selfishly fall asleep with the back of my head nestled into my Waifu’s crotch, as she forlornly spoons dry coco-pops into her mouth while watching the weekly ominbus of Eastenders – too polite to wake me and send me home.



This is the last picture. Really don’t know where to go from here. I am a 30-something guy who should know better – and yet here I am making ridiculous blog posts in work hours again when I should be… you know, doing actual work.


If anyone in IT decided to look at my search history, I would totally be fired. Pretty much everything I do on a daily basis contravenes the employee handbook and would warrant a verbal and written warning.


Living the dream folks! ^_^


Until next time.

ILJG xxx


PS – if you want one, you can get them here. Or rather you would if they weren’t sold out.


Er… or so a friend tells me.

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